funny quotes pics

I didn't want my picture taken because I was going to cry. I didn't know why I was going to cry, but I knew that if anybody spoke to me or looked at me too closely the tears would fly out of my eyes and the sobs would fly out of my throat and I'd cry for a week. I could feel the tears brimming and sloshing in me like water in a glass that is unsteady and too full. ~Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar, Chapter 9



I hold that the parentheses are by far the most important parts of a non-business letter. ~D.H. Lawrence



It's never too late to have a happy childhood. ~Berke Breathed



Man is a blind, witless, low brow, anthropocentric clod who inflicts lesions upon the earth. ~Ian McHarg



Will urban sprawl spread so far that most people lose all touch with nature? Will the day come when the only bird a typical American child ever sees is a canary in a pet shop window? When the only wild animal he knows is a rat - glimpsed on a night drive through some city slum? When the only tree he touches is the cleverly fabricated plastic evergreen that shades his gifts on Christmas morning? ~Frank N. Ikard, North American Wildlife and Natural Resources Conference, Houston, March 1968



Women are always beautiful. ~Ville Valo



Life is too short to sleep on low thread-count sheets. ~Leah Stussy



The essential joy of being with horses is that it brings us in contact with the rare elements of grace, beauty, spirit, and fire. ~Sharon Ralls Lemon



Life is a shit sandwich. But if you've got enough bread, you don't taste the shit. ~Jonathan Winters



My old father used to have a saying: If you make a bad bargain, hug it all the tighter. ~Abraham Lincoln



Nature has placed man under the government of two sovereign masters, pain and pleasure. ~Jeremy Bentham, Principles of Morals and Legislation, 1789



A user and his leisure time are soon parted. ~Author Unknown



His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets. ~Dorothy Parker



Perhaps only his sense of humor and irony can save him when he hears the most powerful nation in the world speaking of his aggression as it drops thousands of bombs on a poor weak nation more than eight thousand miles away from its shores. ~Martin Luther King, Jr., about Ho Chi Minh, Beyond Vietnam lecture, 4 April 1968



There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won't stand for that. ~Steve Martin There is one thing in this world that is dumber than playing golf. That is watching someone else playing golf. What do you actually get to see? Thirty-seven guys in polyester slacks squinting at the sun. Doesn't that set your blood racing? ~Peter Andrews



Twilight drops her curtain down, and pins it with a star. ~Lucy Maud Montgomery



Technology presumes there's just one right way to do things and there never is. ~Robert M. Pirsig



If you call a thing bad you do little, if you call a thing good you do much. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe



Arriving at one goal is the starting point to another. ~John Dewey



Losers quit when they're tired. Winners quit when they've won. ~Author Unknown